Education

Wondering what I am studying? Me too, apparently I am about to embark upon a new journey in life. I say apparently because although I feel like this is the right time and the right place, and the right way to start my degree there is a part of me that finds this part of my journey to be surreal.

Who am I to think I belong at Uni? How do I expect to be able to find the time to do the study required? Will my children and husband cope without me "there" for them at all times of the day?

I deliberately didn't cook dinner tonight. In fact I deliberately left everything, to see if they could fend for themselves. The did, but it took until 8:30pm for this event to occur and I think then it involved a toasted cheese sandwich. Should I feel guilty about this? I did inform said husband that there was meat in the fridge to be BBQ'd, and that I was quite prepared to make a salad to accompany the meat when it was nearly ready... It didn't happen. There were other more important matters to take care of. This might seem like I'm winging to some of you, but to be honest I am not upset in the slightest, just merely perplexed by what I find important vs what my husband finds important. Our priorities do not align. Also my kids were very unsettled about going to bed, way overtired and out of sorts.

I am enrolled in Bach of Social Sciences Psychology. I hope to learn more about what makes us people tick, so to speak. But more important than that, today I discovered that I am learning about life, what works, what doesn't work, for me and mine.

I have learned a lot today, primarily through reading forum posts. I feel a little more informed which has helped me feel a lot less nervous, and even more excited about my upcoming subjects.

So as for all those questions at the beginning of this post, I guess I am me, I am curious, I expect to juggle the time, because I plan to make it work. My kids and hubby coped tonight, though I doubt I will do that often to them, dinner time within our family is just far too important to leave up in the air like that, so I have learned that I didn't like tonight's solution.

Dear reader, what did you learn today? Given your day today all over again, would you do it differently?, and if you did would you still have learnt what you did?

Yet more questions...

This day, it blossoms with the sun shining on the lake to remind me that today, this day, that has been given to me is a blessed thing.

I should be grateful for it. Yet I find myself often caught up in the hussel of the morning. Kids fed? Kids dressed? Dog Walked? DID I have breakfast? Did I brush my teeth, rush here, there around the house not quite remembering to look out the window... and yet there is it, just a glimpse of it... begging me to take a longer look...

I DID look at it, I took it in for that brief and fleeting second, I recall the sun not quite on the lake as yet but just warming the land on the otherside, making it glow in golden glory. Making magic happen right before my very eyes. I sigh, it takes my breathe away and I long to stay and look a little longer, and my daughter calls for me, the call to do her hair...

I did her hair, in fact I've done all that I was supposed to do for today, and I found 10mins to spare so what did I do, I took the time to write this here, in the hopes to really enjoy the moment. Now? Now I will go upstairs and hope to see the sun on the lake again for a few more moments before I head off to collect my children from school. I hope you get a chance to stop and really enjoy the moment today, whether it's the smile on a child's face, or the colour/smell of a flower, the tempestuous storm from which you are sheltered, or just the happiness in your heart.

Yes if you get the chance stop to smell the roses today.